The Words I Needed to Read

     I read something last week, and it has sort of stuck with me since I read it. I read a Tumblr post by author Veronica Roth (author of the Divergent series), in which she detailed her struggle with anxiety. Her post about how hard she struggled for a while hit close to home for me, and I almost felt like I wanted to cry reading it. She also painted such a real, un-romanticized or sugar-coated picture of life with anxiety and the process of getting help that works for your brain. (Her post is titled "Anxiety, Meds, and Words from the Horizon. (So to Speak.)" if you want to look it up on Tumblr and read it. I recommend reading it. You can find the link for it on her Twitter account.)
     One thing in particular Ms. Roth said made me stop for a second. She said her therapist told her at one point, that she didn't have to fight so hard. Veronica Roth, according to her Tumblr post (like me for a time), didn't want to try medication because she thought she could handle her anxiety on her own. I just sat there for a moment after I read that, thinking, "Man, I wish someone would have said that to me this past summer when I was struggling and still too terrified to ask for help." The statement is simple, but to me, after I fought so hard for so long, it was profound.
     Ms. Roth basically detailed everything that had gone through my head at the idea of asking for help, especially if medication was involved. (I have since changed my way of thinking about medication.) Ms. Roth also pointed out in her post that she doesn't think therapy is fun either, but she went anyway to help get herself to a better place and not be so controlled by her anxiety. It was one of those moments, when you read someone else's story, and you think, "They get it. They really understand." For me, those moments are very rare.
     Ms. Roth also got real about the (sometimes) struggle to find the right medication. This is an area that I don't have a lot of experience with since I stopped trying medications after my first and terrifying experience with a certain medication I tried when I started experiencing the symptoms of Panic Disorder. I encourage you to read her post if you're on the fence about medication that could help you or if you're on the fence about getting any kind of help.
     I'll end with this: I'm so glad that Tumblr post from Veronica Roth popped up in my Twitter feed last week. I honestly wish I could have seen something like this sooner, especially from someone like Ms. Roth, since I look up to her as a writer. She basically said everything I needed to hear over the past summer when I felt like I was losing what little bit of sanity I had clung to over the years. I still need to be reminded of the things she said even today, as I work toward getting to a better place. 

Resources:

Roth, V. (2016, May 23.) Anxiety, meds, and words from the horizon. (so to speak.).

     (Web log post). Retrieved from http://theartofnotwriting.tumblr.com/post/144829690341/anxiety- meds-and-words-from-the-horizon-so-to